he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
