Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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