Where is the hickey?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
