Your mouth is God's brothel.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
