i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
