Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
