I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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