dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
