PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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