i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
be right there i have to get my cape
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
