Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
And then my night got REAL pukey
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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