saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
