So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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