So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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