I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
