whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
