Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
