So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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