just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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