grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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