So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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