No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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