TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
