We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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