man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
