i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
he's gonorrhea incarnate
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I need a beard to bite.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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