Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
