she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
