I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
zippers are such a cool invention
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
50% drunk capacity currently
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
