No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Randomize
